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Sarah, 37, is a stockbroker and single.

Single mother looking to start a family 30 I Am Seeking Sexual Partners

Her last long-term relationship finished two years ago. She doesn't have to be reminded that time is ticking by at break-neck speed, her biological clock does it for her. Ten years ago Sarah, like so many thirtysomethings, imagined that life would have panned out differently by now, that there'd be man in the picture, a child as well, maybe two. Like Bridget Jones, she's getting on and she's getting anxious.

But rather than settle for second best, like poor old Lesley Ash in Men Behaving Badly, Single mother looking to start a family 30 chosen another solution. Lots of my friends have settled for unsatisfactory relationships, so they can have children - it's the easiest thing to do. She has also rejected Free sex online Coldwater Kansas option of sleeping with a male friend.

For women in their late thirties, it could take a year of soulless one-night stands to do the trick. In this light, a monthly trip to a fertility clinic suddenly seems infinitely more desirable and practical.

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It's easy to see why Sarah views DI as more emotionally honest and straightforward. Lookibg about settling for what I want. Karen, 38 and a drama teacher, is also single and desperate to start a family.

She is weighing up the advantages of donor insemination, but has reservations. My nightmare is that I'd end up with the child of someone completely undesirable. Also, I don't like the idea that you're buying something; putting your money down for some mothr sperm. It makes me feel uneasy. Last week, comedian Sandi Toksvig was quoted in the papers as saying artificial insemination was "incredibly easy".

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She is now separated from her long-term female partner, but her three children were conceived with the aid of a close male friend and a "10p stadt from Boots". Since the mid-Seventies, self-insemination has been a tried and trusted option for lesbians - there were self-help guides on the subject, such as Lisa Saffron's Getting Fmaily Our Own Way. As well as providing practical details of how to collect and insert sperm, guides like these made a political statement about taking reproductive control.

All this is a relatively new arena for the thirtysomething Lone Ranger - her fertility needs are increasingly similar but she has no overt political agenda. Instead, many single heterosexual women who want children view artificial insemination as the last resort - an option that somehow symbolises failure.

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But ten years down the line, she could feel very differently. Already, there is a shift in attitude among the thirtysomething sector. Medical estimates Single mother looking to start a family 30 that about women a year - 10 times the number five years ago - are becoming single parents. With monthly treatments costing between pounds and poundsperhaps it is the first time so many single professional women can afford it.

But they are also seeing it as a more responsible scenario than, say, a short-lived fling or an unsatisfactory relationship that would probably end anyway.

True life: Dating while being a single mom to young kids is complicated - Motherly

All the women I spoke to who underwent the treatment also agreed that one of the decisive factors was receiving sperm that had been screened rather than risking Strapon sex Eau Claire Michigan sex. It's because they can't find suitable men. Quite often, they've come out of a serious relationship and they haven't met anybody else," she says.

Yet many clinics are unwilling to treat single women, lookkng Single mother looking to start a family 30 couples should be given first priority. With the fear of a decrease in sperm donees, these views are unlikely to shift, even though the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority have published guidelines which don't exclude single women. Professor Craft, who treats each case on an individual basis, says, "There is a responsibility to make sure the child will be looked after and that proper provision has been made if something happens to the mother.

Other clinics may shift their policy, though, as more couples are turning away from donor insemination and using a new male fertility treatment called ICSI. As one fertility insider explains, "This may mean that private clinics will lose business - then they could view the single Single mother looking to start a family 30 as a new and desirable customer. Loooking, in terms of attitudes, we are way behind our American counterparts who have already geared up to the full marketing potential of DI.

There are numerous support groups for "Single Mother's By Choice" and even a website with messages such as, "I am a single career woman that is possibly looking toward artificial insemination. I have nothing against a lookint household, but this is just an option I'm considering.

Single mother looking to start a family 30

Any help would be appreciated. In Britain, the single women I interviewed felt they have motuer to remain quite discreet about their decision to choose DI. Sophie, 40, decided to have DI three years ago and still hasn't told her family exactly how she got pregnant. I had a serious illness and took stock of my life.

One result was that I lpoking wanted Single mother looking to start a family 30 child. I talked about the possibility of Sintle with two male men friends but Lonely mature woman ready woman looking sex felt totally dishonest. It felt like using them - it wasn't the right way to do it. So, she went for monthly treatments at a fertility clinic and became pregnant after three years.

The difference is, in a couple, you're atart doing it with someone else, someone who's there to support you. She says, "It's a difficult time to be a single woman in your late thirties and forties. I still don't think I'll meet someone.

But at a certain stage, I just thought I've got to go for it on my own. Which is why the Lone Ranger's Single mother looking to start a family 30 for children will become even more controversial than the issue of lesbian parents. The singleton's decision to go-it-alone is, unwittingly, a far more blatant rejection of masculinity.

While Toksvig and her partner went for the DlY option because, in practical terms, they had no other way of doing it, Sarah, Sophie and hundreds of women like them Singld. It's just that they weren't prepared to settle for second or third best.

Sophie, now with a three-year-old daughter, says, "It really fami,y me. I expect an awful lot. I enjoy living on my own and I'm not prepared to compromise.

Donor insemination is usually administered to the uterus via the cervix. A woman undergoes the treatment, which takes about 20 minutes, once a month, at the most fertile time of her cycle. All sperm is medically screened and quarantined for six months, and donor receivers can state a preference for limited characteristics like hair colour, eye colour, height and build. For more information, contact the DI Network onor the Single mother looking to start a family 30 charity Child on You can find our Community Guidelines in full here.

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You can also choose to be emailed when someone replies to your comment. The existing Open Comments threads will continue to exist for those who do not subscribe to Independent Minds. Due to the sheer scale ot this comment community, we are not able to give Single mother looking to start a family 30 post the same level of attention, but we have preserved this area in the interests of open debate.

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